Sunday, May 24, 2015

When you share your truth with others... Are you adding color, your own special brush strokes, a sculpture, a frame, relating to what they can understand, using compassion, releasing your emotions, passing the dibbuk (as my Grandma would say)?

I wrote this song during a really difficult time in my life, that I obviously got through, but not gonna lie, it still haunts me.  Art has always helped me process all the while being entertaining and expressive of the human spirit.

Recording a song is an interesting process as it solidifies a jam into a sculpture.

When I wrote this song "Painted Truth" it made perfect sense I would title my album the same name.  I struggled with the idea of freezing songs; ever-expressing stories of a  melody into  unmoving sculptures, unable to sprout and grow like the live entities they really are.  And so encapsulated it as a painting seemed more than appropriate.

Photography - such an incredible art in itself- yet to go along with this metaphor, a painting of me and my band and my stories would be very fitting in the album art as opposed to a picture which some say steals the soul as opposed to expresses it. Something rings true about that saying.

This CD, still in the dream state, when my Grandma Sylvia passed I kept hearing, or sensing, her continuous message that "stuff" is just "stuff" and there is too much "stuff.  Although the idea of recording had still not sat completely in reality with me, I got the message, it's not just more "STUFF".  It still is art, life, something that feeds the world instead of drains it (besides the actual petro-chemical cd - yes a HEMP CD would be nice)

My Russian Grandma had a strong sense of confidence, hard work ethic, and almost a stoicness.  A friend of mine shared a popular video with me of Ukrainian artist Kseniya Simonova.  I immediately felt a compassionate connection with her.  I sensed her deep ability to feel the pain of our world and her fortitude to give it enlightenment as she shone her gift full of light onto our world with courage, skill, and boundless talent.  And, of course, connecting to her culturally reminded me of my Grandmother's (and my) roots still filled with so much mystery joined with comfort.

I sent Kseniya Simonova the song with the story behind it.  I shared with her the pain of not truly being heard or seen and how I could only make sense of it by realizing all people ever saw and heard was a painting of my expression - the best painting I could try to display.  For unless they were in my body, mind and spirit experiencing what I experience they cannot possibly see and hear exactly what I do.

Kseniya was moved as an artist by the song and to it expressed her beautiful Sand art; a live, moving expression of a story with grains of sand on top of a lit screen.  I couldn't be happier with the concept of both of us expressing a moving, living art even though it was ultimately captured in a video.

I do hope this video grows with you like a jasmine vine or pear tree.  Over time, I believe the images and words even will transfer and transform meaning into your heart as you need it amidst your deeper understanding of your life relational experiences.

Enjoy









Monday, November 17, 2014

Well, here it is.. the LONG awaited "Love Unspoken" directed by Brandon MiShawn.
Does it meet all of our expectations?
Well, it tells a painful story of basically detoxing a poisonous relationship.. and yet..
the poison was that it was never FULLy requited.
The insecurity was dripping out of the lady's pores just like his "heart was spilling on her dripping bed"
dripping with his emotional gunk some may call demons hidden in his alcohol addiction.
Do the battles we fight with our addictions ever get won?
perhaps.
But why not battle a darkness with light instead of more dark.. seems quicker and straighter to the point.

So what holds anyone back?

Could a dance with an angel heal our resistance?


Play and sing along… here is an Aviva chord and lyric chart for the song:

Love Unspoken -   written by Aviva 1/24/10

starts with just piano
Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/

Verse 1 (Still just piano with guitar effects):
Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/ Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
Is this really goodbye?  To your lips  

Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/ Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
I cannot deny...   A little slipped disappointment

Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/ Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
Here we’ve found a little peace

Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/ Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
The silence of safe touch
Chorus (Bass and Drums come in):
Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Of a love unspoken.  The fear of being close here

Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Buried the fire... He might die if they find out  (those)

Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Diamonds tossed aside(OOOH FAbDbC,BbDbFEb)So he can pretend he's got this worthless soul
Will we ever fill up the familiar void?  
(Tibetan singing bowl chimes in)

Verse 1:
Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb  Bass notes to bold words: (Bb Db  Ab /Bb) Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
our captors...                                                        still hold the jewel

Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/ Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
Too rare...                 Beware my friend

Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb (this)/ Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
(Unaware) cause  we may never (share) find this again

Chorus:
Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Of a love unspoken.  The fear of being close here

Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Buried the fire... Cause we might die if they find out  (those)

Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Diamonds tossed aside(OOOH FAbDbC,BbDbFEb)So he can pretend he's got this worthless soul
Will we ever fill up the familiar void?  
Bridge (GETS ROCKIN! Pump it every beat):
Bbm/Ab/Gb/F/ Bbm/Ab/Gb/F/
instr.

Bbm/Ab/Gb/F/ Bbm/Ab/Gb/F/
And it's just so funny, How I love you so much but don't want it read. . .that I sought the ugly stuff stuck in your soldered head.

Bbm/Ab/Gb/F/ Bbm/Ab/Gb/F/
It's bread and honey; til vulnerability kills my ability dead. I'm ugly with ur heart spilled in my dripping bed

(EVERYONE DROPS OUT EXCEPT PIANO)

Verse 3:
Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/ Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
instr.

Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/*Bass goes boom boom* Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
It's that time, We can't remember            what twisted up true love . . .bleeding our

Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/ Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
hearts into other members of our bodies, not a member of our family anymore

Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/ Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
just a ghost who left the door ajar

Bbm/Ab/Gmb5/Gb/
<instr.>

Chorus:
Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Of a love unspoken.  The fear of being close here

Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Buried the fire... Cause we might die if they find those

Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Diamonds tossed aside(OOOH FAbDbC,BbDbFEb)So we can pretend we’ve got these worthless souls.  Will we ever be whole?

Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Will we ever  fill up the familiar void?  Will we ever fill up the familiar void?

Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/ Bbm/Db/Ab/Bbm/
Will we ever fill up the familiar void? Will we ever fill up? and not give up?

Bbm/(Tibetan singing bowl continues to sound w/vocals after instruments drop out)

Love,
Petunya
Penguin


Wednesday, October 22, 2014

I am getting incredibly excited for the video release party this Saturday October 25th!
It is at a beautiful store that is having its grand opening called The Purple Lotus.
Here is an example of some of the clothing in her line:






I wrote this song to get me out of the spell of a crush that was unclearly requited.   I will say it worked.  Not that I have any kind of answers to love, but I know that when we don't feel complete inside around whoever we are hanging out with we have some self-growth to do in our cocoon so we may later spread our wings in a healthier form of relating.

True Love's Not a Secret - written during Libra New moon 2008 September 28ish Intro one hit each note:
E /G /D /F / E / G / D / F /
Chorus:
E /G /D /F Bb/
True Love's Not a Secret,you'll know loud and clear. You won't have to hide it, You won't feel any fear
E /G /D /F Bb/
True Love's Not a Secret, you'll know loud and clear. You won't have to hide it, You won't feel any fear
Verse 1:
A/E/G/D
I know it's silly for me, Not to have made my match But I've been caught up in this silly game
A / E / G / D (syncopate)
I keep blaming my society and Hollywood who glorify and crucify this thing called . . .love
E /B / A / A
I can't remember when I threw it all away But I'm holding on to what they used to say . . . they said!
Chorus:
E /G /D /F Bb/
True Love's Not a Secret,you'll know loud and clear. You won't have to hide it, You won't feel any fear
E /G /D /F Bb/
True Love's Not a Secret,you'll know loud and clear. You won't have to hide it, You won't feel any fear
interlude w/chanting:
D / A /E /E / D / A /E /E
Verse 2:
A /E/G/D
Religion, tradition, it seems to help keep this jewel safe and sound asleep when clutching is too tight
A /E/G/D
What kills me is when I think I can't tell you how I feel. Who told me I couldn't use my voice?

E /B / A / A
I can't remember when I threw my voice away But I'm letting go, I hear my mama pray . . . she says
...to chorus --->
Chorus:

E /G /D /F Bb/
True Love's Not a Secret,you'll know loud and clear. You won't have to hide it, You won't feel any fear
E /G /D /F Bb/
True Love's Not a Secret,you'll know loud and clear. You won't have to hide it, You won't feel any fear
interlude w/chanting:
A /A / A /A /
Verse 3:
A /E/G/D
Hearing people rant and rave about the latest sexy craze, It just don't do love a lot of good
A /E/G/D
Those magazines,&Jimmy Deans,Charlie Sheens,& starvin teens Looking for love but lost in Hollywood
E /B / A / A
I can't remember when those images weren't there but I'm gonna share my message if I may,hey hey
Chorus:
E /G /D /F Bb/
True Love's Not a Secret,you'll know loud and clear. You won't have to hide it, You won't feel any fear
E /G /D /F Bb/
True Love's Not a Secret,you'll know loud and clear. You won't have to hide it, You won't feel any fear
interlude w/chanting:
D /A/E/E ....(repeatandjamoverandovah!)
As END there is a ritardante 

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

thinkin about anger

thinkin about anger, thinkin about its wildness, thinkin bout its cataclysmic activation element of itself, thinkin bout why the h$#% do i suppress it, thinkin bout its beauty, thinkin bout the power of my bite, thinkin bout my anger about other people's anger, thinkin bout the antedote to anger, thinkin bout a black hole, thinkin bout an alternate universe, thinkin bout embracin the universe as my teddy bear tonight